About The Host

Misery Motivates:

Chronic illness doesn’t have to be accepted, as ‘just the way it is’.  Problems always precede solutions, and the only way to find solutions is to keep looking.  It took years to figure out some of the many pieces of my health, which include an uncontrolled  innate immune response, biotoxin illness, which caused autoimmune deregulation.  Through much research and testing which took me from California to Maryland, I have learned that my genetic makeup reacting with environmental toxins are the root cause. Understanding the cause rather than just treating symptoms is key to managing my health.

The primary environmental factor is Water Damaged Buildings, and the MOLD and other dangerous bugs found where mold grows.  Many antibiotics are produced by mold  toxins (mycotoxins), consequently many antibiotics, also produce the symptoms of massive inflammation which looks like sudden unexplained weight gain: My typical symptoms which develop over 24 hours and last about 4 days are systemic and typically include:

1. *Several pounds of weight gain, in extreme cases I have gained as much as 24 pounds in 24 hours
   

2. *All sorts of stomach and digestive issues include a painful and highly distention intestines, as well as problems with other mucus membranes such as nose, mouth, eyes, throat and lungs 
   

3. *Horrific headaches  similar to migraine but not limited to one side
   

4. *Joint and body pain
   

5. *Issues with vision (I experience a sort of blurring and un-blurring and  have difficulty wearing my glasses.)
   

6. *Cognitive problems, such as memory problems, word recall, and a sense of frustration in my ability to think and communicate well. (I often have a sense of anxiety that has no apparent cause.)
   

Unfortunately, many doctors do not understand innate immune response, and complicated my health problems with drugs such as steroids, and narcotic pain killers which make me worse not better.

Many folks who grew up during the 50’s and early 60’s, in and around Gem County, Idaho as well as other counties drinking raw farm milk are effected with “Downwinders.” That may be a factor in my health as well, since I have had some thyroid problems for many years, that were well controlled before mold exposure.

On my journey which includes a chart full of wrong diagnose, bad guesses and down right bad medicine, I learned that many so called health issues were side effects of  medications. I found the joy of really good health when I stopped going to doctors, listened to what my body was telling me and learned to avoidance antibiotics, mold exposure, and learned to eat a restrictive mold free diet, along with regular activity.

I found the best health of my life, from late 2003 to early 2008, that was despite huge stress, and a number of life changing events.  My health was derailed and I found the worst health of my life from the spring of 2008 through late 2010.  The derailment was caused by faulty installation of a new door which allowed water to seep into my floor boards, causing mold in the home and in the crawlspace.  Unfortunately, mold is often an invisible enemy, difficult to find, and impossible to fight, as long as you are on it’s battle ground.  I have learned that with my genetics, I can find my best function ONLY WHEN I TOTALLY AVOID MOLD! Trying to heal from mold while still being exposed to it, is a lot like fighting a battle against a thousand stealth fighters, armed only with a bow and a very few arrows. 

This is fairly new science. I am grateful science has finally replaced the standard, cut and cover medical model.  That standard of care resulted in the  accidental  aborting of my first pregnancy at 19, the loss of my uterus at 23, my ovaries at 42, both breasts and my gallbladder at 43.  All the surgeries and all the medicines did not make me better, and did not eliminate the core problem of inflammation.  They made me sicker, weaker, and fatter.  I was size 22, 213 pounds in the picture above. I was often more afraid of living then dyeing.   What I have learned along the way isn’t that modern medicine is bad,  but that pioneering biochemist Roger Williams Ph.D. was right, and his work on  understanding how each of us are biochemically unique individuals was an important key to resolving my health challenges.

In 2003 I realized if I ever hoped to find health and peace of mind, I would have to stop relying on the medical community which was not able to help me at that time. From my medical chart, “Pain most likely related to depression from some unresolved childhood issue... Patient unlikely to find resolution given her lack of self management skills.”  For the record I was strictly following the prescribed low-fat, whole grain diet of 1200 calories a day, which was making me sicker and more swollen by the day.  I was swimming four days a week despite breaking out in hives every time, further damaging my immune system. Clearly at that point my doctors had not studied Dr. Williams’ work, and did not understand “innate immune response.”

Rather than giving into the feeling of helplessness and hopelessness, I became the captain of my own ship and took on the challenge of  researching and discovering, sometimes through trial and error, my own biochemical uniqueness.  That journey gave me extended periods of wonderful health, where I was pain free, and found much joy, and great hope and left me free from  inflammation.  I also found some incredible Doctor’s and many other individuals that crossed my path and blessed my life.

If you deal with chronic illness take heart!  There is hope.  Do your best to remember your successes, for they are building blocks to future successes, and strengths in times of struggles.  Learn from mistakes (yours and other’s) for they can be great teachers and solid stepping stones to future successes.  Always get up when you fall and keeping moving forward even if you have to crawl, for that is how you reach your destiny of better health. (If you can’t have perfect health, better health is still better.)  I do believe that pain and adversity when properly applied can be the emotional fertilizer that promotes growth of the soul.  But if we learn from each other we may all avoid some pain. No sense wasting good fertilizer, or using more than we need.

The things I have learned so far in this journey: 

I often have to adjust the pieces of my physical, intellectual or emotional health.

1. 1. I have to pay close attention to my self-talk, and self-care, it is up to me to treat myself with kindness, compassion and respect, other’s are not likely to treat me any better than I treat myself.
   

2. 2.I have to avoid bad medicine and doctors who want to blame stress or me, for everything they don’t understand.  It took time to realize it was a waste of time and energy to defend myself or try to re-educate them.  If they are not open to learning, I don’t have the energy to waste.  Now I try to identify  those medical providers quickly, forgive them and move on. Persistence, patience, and forgiveness are vital tools. There are some brilliant doctors who will partner with you to better understand your health.
   

3. 3.I need to listen to my body instead of just blaming stress. (This is difficult! It goes against everything I was taught.)
   

4. 4. I have to look near and far for those brilliant health care professionals who after finding no answers inside the standard medical box are willing to look outside the box.  (hint: I found many in functional, environmental, and  sometimes in alternative medicine fields.)
   

5. 5. I have to do a lot of research, careful monitoring, and observations if I want to maintain and improve my health. When you have a chronic illness you can not take your health for granted, you have to be vigilant and consistent! Yes it is hard, and sometimes overwhelming but it is worth it.
   

Here are a few key elements that have helped me:  I am not giving medical advice and do not suggest you try any of the following, but they are pieces that help me live my most healthful life. Remember we are all “biochemically unique.” (James Gordon MD)

*Avoidance of the things my body can’t handle is key.  For me that includes,  MOLDS and its toxins, antibiotics, pesticides, a huge list of chemicals including most artificial sweeteners, and sugars. Learning all the things to reduce toxin exposure has been difficult but necessary.  I recommend, non-toxic cookware, using chemical free cleaners for body, and clothes, (fabric softeners are the worst click here for toxic free alternative.) (Thank you Dr. Ritchie Shoemaker, and Dr. Peter Madill,  for helping me understand my need to avoid MOLD, one thing I have to do in the extreme as I try to find balance.) The use of a good air-filters  to keep my environment as mold free as possible is very important, as is moisture control.  It is worth noting here that despite testing for mold that showed my home was fine.  In 2010 I finally discovered an area of mold growth caused by the improperly installed door, when it started growing up my wall.  For several years the water wicked under my floor and silently send bio-toxins into my environment that caused tremendous grief for my body. The mold was only discovered when the unusually high level of spring rains resulted in the moisture also wicking up the wall where I was able to find it. The battle for clean-up and repairs has not yet been won. Improved health came when I left my home and possessions, (things can be replaced, life can’t!!!) I did not leave in time to avoid developing Lupus.

*Diet is a huge key, and it is somewhat individual, good testing from a good functional medicine doctor can help here.  The cost of the tests can be offset by savings in the experimenting.  Careful tracking and observation is necessary as some foods take hours or days for effects to show up. In our modern world I know this is a challenge, and it is essential!!!!!!!!!!  I find organic coconut oil, good grade olive oil, nuts, berries, grass fed beef, wild salmon, fresh vegetables, a few fruits, and a little bit of raw local honey the primary keys in my diet.

*My body needs lots of good clean water to aid in the removal of toxins.  I take my weight divided by two and drink at least that many ounces of plain water every day. 

*My infrared sauna is vital!!!!  I use it several times a week. (I find doing breathing exercise while in the sauna is also helpful. Sometimes I also use self hypnosis tapes.   I have also found the use of oxygen while in sauna beneficial.)  I have to supplement minerals lost through the process (this is really important as without minerals pathways don’t work to detoxify, and maintain healthy  body functions).

1. *I use electrically charged silver products with 10 ppb to support my immune system.  I also found a supplement that helps balance my immune responses.  It has it’s origins in animal health and has been absolutely vital (the human supplement is Epicor, I personally use Diamond VPC.  You will have to do your research.  Here is a place to start (www.naturodoc.com/library/cancer/epicor.htm) .  I have also found MSM with vitamin C  very helpful for pain and healing. Vitamin D3 from a good supplement and good sun shine is another key piece. Good fiber is also important for my digestive health. Omega 3 supplement is also noticeably helpful. I take other supplements including specific amino acids.  I do so under the suppression of my primary health provider, guided by testing.  I have tried many supplements, some helped a lot, some not at all and a few made me worse.  I tried many, many modern medications, a few like Cholestyramine may have saved my life. And it clearly stops the horrific headaches.  Many like Prednisone, Vioxx, and Phen-Phen, and countless antibiotics, did not help and made me worse. I am not anti-medication, and I have to support several of my hormones. I do rely on Cholestryramine to help remove toxins my body can’t.  I have learned to be very careful and research every medication. Often what I thought was a new symptom was a medication side effect.  Ask questions, if it offends your doctor you need a new one.
   

*Oxygen is vital, so learning to breath well and get good oxygen supply is necessary every day!  Breathing exercises helps with stress response, and have made it possible for me to live without inhalers and drugs that have short-term benefit with long-term side-effects. (The physical stress of dealing with chronic illness makes learning to cope with the body’s natural response very important. Don’t blame stress, learn to deal with it.) I used a RESPeRate machine, Body Flex exercises, yoga breathing, and the breathing pattern taught at this site for controlling asthma symptoms http://www.asthmacrc.org.au.  I have also  found benefits from an Oxygen Concentrators/Generators found at www.breathing.com

*Regular sleep patterns, using bright light and dark dark helps give my body a chance to repair itself.

*Positive self-talk, and limited self-pity parties are very important.  It isn’t that I never get there, I just try to limit my time there.  I also try not to beat myself up if I do go there, as that only takes me longer to get away from the pity-party.  I let myself cry and let the waves of emotions pass, usually for less then an a hour, then I start crawling out quickly.  I have found that if I can use humor and laughter as my fuel to get out, it works better than anger as the energy source and doesn’t leave me as tired.

1. *Currently I use plain clear Ammonia,  Borax, natural oils and organic soaps for my body care, I have learned to live without hair dies, perms, and my normal hair-care products . (I have found that pure Aloe Vera Gell, is a nice addition for my hair health and management.   I have  found a few all natural mineral make-ups I can use.  For my skin care I use coconut or olive oil, emu oil, and honey. I use natural deodorant and toothpaste, sometimes I use a technique called oil pulling on my teeth, and several Xylitol products have become invaluable in improving my oral and general health.
   

1. *I try to keep my focus on balance in all areas and realize it is an on going challenge requiring frequent adjustment. When my body responds to something new I accept I have to give it up, but still keep my eyes open for possible alternatives.
   

1. *I do not at this point in life believe that “stress” is the primary causes of many health problems. I better understand that the body was designed to be stressed. I do however believe that good stress management skills help me calm the autonomic system, and are very helpful in reducing the discomfort of the stress response, and reduce added stress on the body.  Allowing my body to use that energy for healing.  I practice self-sooth skills daily, and try to always view my health issues as challenges rather than threats.
   

* Finally I look constantly for those little moments of joy to help balance out pains and struggles. I laugh often, cry when I need, and love with all my heart.

I do hope my story can help others, as the stories of many others have helped to encourage and comfort me.  I will add additional pieces as I experiment with things that make life more comfortable and less painful.